Lovest Thou Me?

Peter didn't know what to do. Have you ever felt that way before? His Savior, leader and guide had left him for the third time and he sat there upon the shores and didn't know what to do with himself and so he said, "I go a fishing." Then after an entire night of not catching any fish (that always happens to me when I go fishing, AJ catches all the fish) the Lord comes to them and tells them where they can find fish. They immediately recognized the Lord, they must have felt dejavu from the first time he called out to them in their boat. Christ prepared a meal for them and had an interaction with Peter that I think is depicted very well by the new bible video made by the church called Feed My Sheep. The Lord asks, "Simon, son of Jonas, Lovest thou me more than these?" Peter fakes a smile and says "Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee." The Lord commands him, "Feed my lambs." The next time the Lord repeats the question Peter musters up a little more conviction to show that he loves the Lord. The command he receives is the same. The final time Christ asks him the same question Peter seems to be pleading with the Lord, "Isn't it true that I love you??" The risen Christ commands him, "Take care of your brothers and sisters." 

Even as a missionary, when life is simple and you have a single purpose, I feel like I get lost along the way. After the 50th time that someone has told you that they don't care if you want to share something amazing with them, it's freezing cold outside, and people are giving you condemning looks, it is hard to accept the command to feed His sheep. This was a moment that I experienced last week while we were contacting at a metro stop. I stopped for a moment to consider how ridiculous this was, and how I could be so much more comfortable now. Then a voice came to my mind, and called me by name saying, "John, do you love me?" No one knows me by that name here. But to me it sounded like, do you love me more than you love being comfortable? Do you love me more than you love doing your own things? And I had to pause to re-evaluate myself and my intentions. A sweet spirit entered my heart and filled me with a desire to be closer to God, and keep trying to help others do the same. I think we all can receive that assurance if we forget ourselves and get lost in others.

We had some amazing teaching opportunities and miracle this week. The first one is an investigator from ShangHai that I mentioned in my last entry. He committed to and came to church, and he brought two of his chinese friends! What a blessing that was to sit with them for fast and testimony meeting. The next investigator is currently attending American University and is one of the deepest thinkers that I have met. I felt genuine curiosity from him as we talked about the convictions we have about the truthfulness of the gospel. He is seeking for something to answer all his questions and I'm excited for him to find the answers in what we have to share with him. We are also working with a student at George Washington that is studying law and business, super smart. He was raised Jewish but said he didn't find the fulfillment he is looking for. He heard that Mormonism is a good transition for those that are Jewish background and so he referred himself on mormon.org. Sister missionaries were at his door within 12 hours, and he called us to set up the appointment. We had one of the best restoration lessons I've been a part of, I love being a part of such a great work!